July 2, 2009

Mustache Mania - the hot fashion trend sweeping the nation

Well the other day I was shopping in the ultra chic boutique called Dollarama. This chain of boutiques specialize in many fine items ranging from pot scrubbers to plastic figurines of the Virgin Mary. The current demographic seems to be people trying to write humor blogs, and heroin addicts looking for the methadone clinic.

As my eyes scanned the cluttered shelves I was excited to see an item that was guaranteed to make an impact with the global celebutants - "Mustache Mania" it was called. It's unassuming package design does not show consumers the vast potential that they now hold in their hands.



When you purchase "Mustache Mania" you get more than an assortment of left over hair plugs and some industrial adhesive. You get the ability to change into people such as "The Weasel" "The Bruiser" and "The Hollywood". These mustaches give the wearer the ability to experience life as if they where an "A" list celebrity.

If you do happen to be an "A" list celebrity reading this, I am willing to consider reasonable offers for my upcoming screen play entitled - "Mustache Mania - The story of a boy,a mustache and a dream"

I could not believe my good fortune in finding such a hot item of haute couture. It was less than an dollar and it is also a choking hazard! - What more can anyone ask for?

I nonchalantly grabbed all the "Mustache Mania" packages that the store had in stock and with my arms now fully loaded I made my way to the cash register.

It was only after the clerk put the last of my "Mustache Mania" packages in the bag that I let a smile cross my lips. I felt like someone who just found a Picasso at a yard sale.

I'll be modeling the mustaches supplied to see if they give me access to the inner power circles in Hollywood. Stay tuned sports fans.

"The Sheriff" out.....

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5 comments:

Lord Likely said...

Why, that moustache suits you rather well, sir!

If you enjoy moustaches, you may enjoy this distraction in my journals - there are a plethora of tashes on offer!

http://www.lordlikely.com/archives/random-insertions/the-moustache-o-rama

Janet Jarrell said...

OK this isn't exactly like the Dave I remember from school - save the mouth! Ha

I haven't quite heard this before..."ultra chic boutique called Dollarama" - kind of like referring to McDonald's as a restaurant of any kind. It is just not so!

Janna said...

I'm amused by the fact that it's a "choking hazard". :)

Unknown said...

Do you offer mustache rides. That was my first thought.

Unknown said...

Lord Likely - I perused your site and indeed as advertised there are a veritable bounty of mustaches and mustache based entertainment

Janet - You mean McDonald's isn't a fine restaurant? - Don't tell that to the rednecks -

Janna - "Choking hazard" is just one of the many valued added features

Ettarose - I think the ability to give mustache rides comes as an expansion pack or add on to the current mustache mania family. I'll let you know if I find it next time I'm at Dollarama