Are you smarter than a microwave oven?

I fear that if mankind continues down our current path, in a few short years the cognitive ability of mankind will be superseded by simple household appliances such as the coffeemaker or microwave. We are going to wake up one morning and find ourselves being ruled over by a programmable toaster.

Let’s consider the facts shall we;

Computers chips are getting smaller and more technologically advanced. An article in the Scientific Armenian stated that the computer chip in the programmable egg timers of today, is in fact more powerful then the computer chip that was used during the entire “Race for Space” in the 1960’s. Computers in their early years where housed in warehouses and where serviced by teams of scientists scuttling here and there in an attempt to diagnose the chirps and beeps emitting from the steam belching behemoths.

Fast forward a few decades and we can see that computers have made much bigger advancements than mankind has. Consider how the Blackberry has spread it's influence though society. It is now considered a vital accessory to any successful business person. The field of medicine has made huge steps forward thanks to computers as well. Computers now allow for the improved acquisition, display and analysis of radionuclide data that is used in Nuclear Medicine.

The speed at which technology is advancing makes your head spin.

What advancements can mankind speak of? – Ladies and Gentlemen let me present mankind’s crowning glory – “Cheese in a Can” and Reality TV.



A steady diet of either of aforementioned items and your brain is sure to atrophy and shrivel up to the size of a raisin. Don’t believe me? Try this experiment and for fun use your spouse as the “control”



Watch back to back episodes of Rock of Love whilst dining on an aerosol propelled “cheese” like product. If you find yourself saying either of the following phrases – “Hey this cheese like product is tasty and delicious” or “Rock of Love is such a touching drama it's like how Daddy met Momma”

Do not pass Go or collect $200 but hitch a ride on public transit – it’s obvious you should not be driving in your condition - and kindly ask the nice Bus driver person to run the wheels of their bus over your head repeatedly until you are dead.

If on the other hand you find yourself gagging at both the “Cheese” like product and Rock of Love – go forth and procreate. Copulate, copulate copulate. This is your duty as a reasonably intelligent human being . Spread your genes. It is only the speed of your sperm and fertility of your eggs that will save mankind from a thankless existence paying homage to a waffle maker.