"Test Tube Celebrity" - the latest craze from Tinseltown

It seems that everyone who considers themselves a celebrity now a days, has their own perfume or clothing line. Well the line of products stamped "Star Approved" has just increased thanks to some innovative and savvy celebrity surgeons.

The founding surgeons of an exclusive Beverly Hills clinic have come up with a new way for diehard fans to get even closer to their celebrity idols with an exciting new product line called "Test Tube Celebrity"

Dr. Wii Hackem - the founder of this new product line is only to happy to explain;

"At our exclusive clinic we deal with a lot of celebrity clients. Clients who come in for some liposuction, botox injections or face lifts. My partners and I noticed that when we complete any surgical procedure we have left over materials - These materials can be a few pounds of fat that we suctioned off Kristi Alley's thighs, or it could even be a flap of excess skin we removed from Joan River's neck."

With Celebrity Watching having become so wide spread in today's culture, these Doctors found themselves sitting on a virtual goldmine.

Thanks to "Test Tube Celebrity" people like you or I can now own their very own piece of a Hollywood Celebrity.

Dr Hackem goes on to explain;

"The fat that we vacuumed off David Hasselhoff last week, is packaged in a limited edition Swarovski crystal test tube that fans of the Hoff can now purchase with their credit card through our website. When you display the Swarvoski test tube we guarantee that all of your friends will be green with envy over your piece of a Hollywood celebrity. When you purchase Test Tube Celebrity you will also receive a signed picture from the celebrity who was the former host to the fat cells that you now have on display in your living room."

"The law of supply and demand keeps prices high" The good doctor laughs, "Celebrities that have let themselves go, such as Kristie Alley or Roseanne Barr, will of course have lots of fat to be vacuumed off to sell - this keeps the price for their fat cells much lower then someone like Mary Kate or Ashley Olsen who we rarely see in our clinic"

Test Tube Celebrity - now that is a product that I'm sure everyone can be excited about. Men will scratch and claw at each other just to be the first on the block to have the Pamela Anderson Test Tube Celebrity - while women will scour the clinic's shelves non stop looking for any remnant of Tom Jones.

Good News about Flesh Eating Disease

Flesh eating disease - the term itself sends a shudder down our collective spines as we imagine microscopic creepie crawlies snacking on our innards until we finally expire in a dried out husk of our former selves. I think there is the potential for big money in flesh eating disease - think Hollywood starlets that are obsessed about their weight.

With some federal grant money into the cosmetic application of flesh eating disease or necrotizing fasciitis - for those of you who care about those things - we have the new celebrity weight loss program. There will have to be an intense marketing campaign done to educate people into the positive aspects of Necrotizing Fasciitis - but if people now are lining up for botox injections there is hope for flesh eating disease as a weight loss application.

Hell, Botox paralyzes your face - and you look like Joan Rivers but - here's the spin folks - it reduces wrinkles and makes you look years younger. What busy mom on the go would not want that? Now that same marketing approach and a few high profile celebrities behind the flesh eating disease craze, and it won't be long before people are lining up to have some microscopic creepy crawlies eat away at their innards just so they can fit into their bikini. I just want to lose a few pounds that's all

What would make a good catch phrase for the new weight loss craze soon to sweep the nation?

Flesh Eating Disease - gets you "World Vision" thin in one simple application.

Are you envious of the Ethiopians who can fit into their bikinis? - well be envious no more - Necrotizing Fasciitis - drop the pounds and get on the beach!

Make the Olsen twins look fat - with Necrotizing Fasciitis now in new cheeseburger flavor.

What would you suggest for a catchphrase - I'm on humor blogs .com and they are could stand to lose a few pounds.....

Mary Kate is that you???